Houston LGBTQ Community Remembers Michael Adam Milam, Beloved Bartender and Advocate

Michael Adam Milam, a well-known figure in Houston’s LGBTQ community and a longtime Montrose bartender, was killed in a hit-and-run crash in the early hours of Saturday, July 12, in New Orleans. He was riding his bicycle home from work when he was struck.

Milam had recently returned to New Orleans, a city he loved, to continue his bartending career in the heart of the French Quarter’s LGBTQ community. Though he had been back only a short time, his presence was already being felt by colleagues and patrons alike.

In Houston, Milam spent many impactful years behind the bar at several iconic LGBTQ establishments, including JR’s Bar & Grill, The Eagle, Buddy’s, Tony’s Corner Pocket, and Michael’s Outpost. Known for his magnetic energy and ability to light up a room, Milam quickly became a fixture of the Montrose nightlife scene.

In 2023, he was voted by OutSmart readers as Best Male LGBTQ Bartender of the Year, an honor that reflected not only his professional skill but the joy and connection he brought to those around him.

Milam’s contributions extended beyond the bar. Since 2014, he regularly volunteered with PFLAG, offering his bartending talents for numerous fundraisers and events. He was also an active member of Houston Gaymers, a group for LGBTQ video game enthusiasts. What began as volunteer bartending at their meetups eventually evolved into a standing partnership, with the group hosting its monthly gatherings at Buddy’s—a collaboration made possible through Milam’s initiative and support.

Friends and colleagues say his advocacy and behind-the-scenes efforts quietly but powerfully strengthened the community he served.

Milam is survived by his older brother, Jeffry Faircloth of Houston, also a member of Houston’s LGBTQ community; sisters Hollie Faircloth of Idaho, Tiffany Gragg of New Orleans, Brittany Milam of Canyon, Texas, and Brandi Milam of Colorado; and his father and stepmother, Randy and Tara Milam of Houston. He was preceded in death by his mother, Dawne Engelke, who died in 2014 in Salado, Texas.

Milam was also a devoted dog owner. His beloved dog Diesel was rarely far from his side, and he also cherished his dog Nuni.

A memorial is tentatively scheduled for Saturday, August 2, at JR’s Bar & Grill in Montrose. Further details will be announced as they are confirmed.

Milam’s loss is deeply felt throughout Houston’s LGBTQ community and beyond. Those who knew him remember his heart, humor, and unwavering care—and the many lives he touched through every act of kindness, every space he energized, and every community he helped build.