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Houston GLBT Community Center Goes French with Un Soiree Pelouse: A Garden Party. Plus OutSmart’s guide to choosing a drag name.

GardenCrew
Garden crew

If you are one of those people who eats Freedom Fries or drinks only domestic Bordeaux, go ahead and turn to the next story, please. There’s nothing for you on this page.

But if you are a fan of all things French, you’ll love Un Soiree Pelouse: A Garden Party, a campy gala fundraising event set for April 20 at Rich’s.

Granted, the name Un Soiree Pelouse: A Garden Party sounds similar to the annual très gay Garden Party fundraiser of days gone by. But the two events are in no way connected, Houston GLBT Community Center board member Marc Garcia, says.

“The idea for Un Soiree Pelouse sprung from our desire to do a signature fundraising event for the programs of the community center, one that was really diverse and would get everybody involved,” Garcia says.

Garcia, who co-chairs the event with Tom Baker, hopes the soiree will eventually enable the center to fund a scholarship program for GLBT students.

In addition to complimentary well drinks and non-stop dance music, Soireers can expect to be treated to the hilarious antics of emcee Anita Bump and special guest entertainer, Bernadette. Additionally, M2M Fashion Lounge provides an “out of this world” runway fashion show with a sexy French twist, featuring both male and female models. Jenna Drey, Eric Alan, and XM Radio DJ Mark D round out the entertainment.

Even if it’s something as simple as sticking a croissant in your bonnet, the required attire for Un Soiree Pelouse is something à la Français, Garcia insists.

“Or they could simply wear something red or black, which are our theme colors,” he adds.

As if all this voulez-vous action weren’t enough, Pelouse partiers are eligible to win a free Norwegian Cruise Line vacation, compliments of AquaFest; you must be present to win.

Admission starts at $25, with VIP packages ranging from $100 to $250, with proceeds benefiting the Houston GLBT Community Center. April 20, 2–6 p.m. Rich’s, 2401 San Jacinto St. Details: www.myspace.com/agardenparty.

Photo caption (clockwise from bottom left): Marc Garcia, Kelly Murray, Tom Baker, Dominick Soliz, and Anita Bump (center) roll out the French finery for Un Soiree Pelouse: A Garden Party.

Spring queen: The self-styled “mouthy, smart-ass, hilarious” diva Anita Bump, who emcees Un Soiree Pelouse on April 20, made her debut seven years ago at the annual Pranksters In Pumps fundraiser show presented by Montrose Softball League (which this year takes place on April 5, 6–9 p.m., at Rich’s, featuring a special Bump performance). In addition to Un Soiree Pelouse, presented by and benefiting the Houston GLBT Community Center, Anita Bump’s activities include hosting a weekly show at Rich’s on Saturdays at midnight. Her content-rich website, www.anitabump.com, is no doubt one of the few drag-queen sites that features new food and cocktail recipes every month—for April, Apple-Pear Crisp and Sparkling Mint Lemonade.

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How Does Your Garden Drag?
OutSmart ‘s guide to choosing a drag name

It started innocently enough:

Q: “Does anyone have change for a dollar?”

A: “Changephora Dollah! That would make a great drag name!”

Like most people who find themselves deeply ensconced in the GLBT culture, OutSmart staffers frequently find our daily conversations to be peppered with potential stage names.

And why not? Queer folk have been doing drag for centuries, perhaps even as long ago as when Adam first noticed Eve’s fig leaf and decided that color of green would look great for his big exit-from-the-Garden-of Eden production number.

As you prepare your costume for Soiree Pelouse, whether you opt to duct tape up that manly chest of yours to fashion some faux décolletage or you duct-tape down your more feminine front to convey the illusion of pecs, OutSmart wants to help.  

We offer these potential monikers to you, hoping each name will be adopted by a fledgling performer and come to life in a Celine Dion medley on a gay stage near you.


FOR THE QUEENS
Baby Bokchoy
Baby Backribs
Lotta Brisket
Lolli Gagg
Glori Hole
Lotta Latte
Frieda Lay
Ova deRainbo
Bobbi Yega
Maura Myass
Venus Envy
Bow Tie Mary
Auntie Em Bolism
Prada Myazz
Balmy Brisas (breezes)
Angie O’Plasty
Dixie Humpfest
Sherry Vine
Carmen Monoxide
Rosita Bellini
Honey Musto
Rosie Glow
Rosie Palm
Raiza Blade
Val Capone
Ginger Snapped
Hootin’ Annie
C. Alice
Vi Agra
Celexa Moodswing
A. Nell Retentive
Lexa Pro
Lexa Con
Muffy Diver
Ivana B. Strokanoff
Lenten Vespers
Hortense N. Uptight
Margo West-Youngman
Minnie Apolos
Tasta Kugel
Ivana Schmuck
Bessie Merculo
Chava Goyim
Shmera Philly
Gnosh Bagel
Sofonda Bush
Sofonda Muffaletta
Ensalada Romaine
Penny Traytion
Nocturna E. Missions
Val. Hollah!
Carrie Okee
Ella Funt
Marion Ferlove
Marion Fermoney
Etta Youngin
Changephora Dallah
Shonda Licious
Appassionetta von Klymaxxx
Agnes Day
Regina Salve
Rosetta Stone
Ivana Biggun
Lady Fingers
Amy Nitrate
Clawnna Pin
Crema Poblano
Martha Vineyard
Whit E. Banter
Rusty Cox
Dusty Rubbers
Condi Nasty
Phyllis Uppabowl
Clenda Myacin
Crampé Clotalot
Bigraq Wannalay
Cuppa Desire
Cinnamon Hazelnut
Caramel Delight
Rosetta Stoned
Dirty Martini
Nappy-Headed and Heidi, The Ho Sisters
Krystal Meth
Sweddy Boa
Okra Homo
Oprah Homo
Okla Homo
Lynn Queeny
Mia Kulpa
Pepper Mashay
Bangbang LaDesh
Marcia Dimes
Lo Mein
Grace Anatomy
Nelly Fritata
Rossa Tabula
Mama Condom
Helen Highwater
Helena Handbasket
Kittie Withawhip
Fannie Pflag
Polly Tishun
Aceta Menophin
Xanna Ax
Ova N. Dunwith
Pashmina Shawl
Mammary Lane
Helena Handbasket
Sadie N. Gommorrah
Faith N. Begorrah
Iris Scanner
Mimi Inyu
Heidi Sausage
Minnie Dicque
Heidi Saphallic
Park N. Rear
Rod Stollen
Nomo Johnson
Dick Missin

FOR THE KINGS
Harry Baxter
Crayton Burrell
Harry Palm
Papa Razzi
Cocky Friedman
Elmo Stlegal
Vasili Putty
Rusty Kneedle
Emerson Bigtatas
Manny Beaver-munch
Peter Packer
Ron Rico
Chester Drawers
Sam O’Nella
Moishe Towelette
Manuel Feed
Rod Lightning
Justin Time
Justin Case
Justin Thenikatime
Ian E. Meany
Miney Moe
Al Dentay
Al Fresco
Norm de Plume
Lex Apro
Jacques Strapp
Jacques Tootight
Major Razorburn
Beau Ganvilla
Chris Anthemum
Seymour Jane
Rusty Cox
Bayer Lee Maninuff
Dusty Rubbers
Tater Peeler
Philip Heads
Ruben Esk
Buster Nutt
Seymour Tudy
Lance Boil
Emerson Bigballs
Bayer Lee Cubb
Stiffy McHardwood
Montrose Montrose
Golly
Saddam Gomorrah
Lucky Hugh
A. Sid Rayne
Taint Gotwon

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