What A World

Just when we think the news can’t get any weirder... From the Justins' hoodies to the Girl Scouts' tasty lesbo commie cookies.

Move over, New Orleans, with your sugared-dough-fried-in-fat beignets. Step aside, Philadelphia, with your Velveeta-dripping cheese steak sandwiches. Once again, Houston has been named the fattest city in America.

Are you enjoying the Republican debates as much as I am? It’s like watching a three-ringed circus featuring nothing but the elephants and their dung.

The last time I remembered having it on was at the Southern Park Mall.

What a year, what a year. 2011, or Apocalypse Eve, as The History Channel called it (before The History Channel became The Hey-Look-at-All-This-Crap-I-Have-in-My-Garage Channel) is almost gone

The first time I became aware of Colonel Margarethe Cammermeyer was in April of 1993, on the lawn in front of the Pentagon in Washington, DC.

Drop an egg on a sidewalk. These days, it won’t fry. It simply disintegrates, leaving behind an ashy little stain under a mini-mushroom cloud.

Regardless of our individual belief systems, we should all be thanking God that the story about presidential candidate Michele Bachmann and her not-gay husband’s reparative therapy clinic for homos has come out, so to speak,…

Dots and decapitation. Formerly the site of (what else?) a mattress factory, the Mattress Factory is one of Pittsburgh’s most popular contemporary art museums for the city’s avant-garde scene. Yayoi Kusama’s Infinity Dots Mirrored Room…

Loyal readers of this column (thank you, friends) know that I spent the first 28 years of my life in the Midwest before fleeing for Texas to find my gay tribe.