OutLoud

by Sally Sheklow

HOLY CONTEMPLATION

Why are the right-wingers so spooked by same-sex marriage?

As I write this, the Hebrew calendar tells me we’re in the middle of Sukkoth (pronounced Sue COAT). Even though Sukkoth is also known as The Festival of Booths, this holiday has nothing to do with John Wilkes or Shirley. According to sacred texts, one week after the High Holy Days of Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur, Jews are instructed to build roofless, open-air booths outdoors and hang out there all week pondering the greatness of the universe. Sukkoth may very well prove the biblical origins of other booth-based phenomena such as Burning Man, and drive-thru espresso.

A Sukkoth booth, called a Sukkah (rhymes with hookah), is a simple structure made of sticks and boughs. Jews around the world add their own cultural variations for decorating the Sukkah. In desert regions they use fronds from the date palm, in Spain they use olive branches, in the Northwest where I live we use blue tarps.

We sit inside the Sukkah and reflect on our ancestors’ departure from slavery in Egypt and how they had no place to live while they wandered in the desert. They pieced together makeshift structures with whatever they could devise, which is how duct tape was invented.

Inclusiveness and diversity are the big themes of the holiday. We’re supposed to welcome the stranger, because we were once strangers in a strange land. The idea is to sit in our Sukkah and think about freedom and faith and life’s great mysteries, such as our purpose here on Earth—beyond opening doors for cats. We contemplate the impermanence of our dwellings, the eternal nature of the source of life, and why this holiday doesn’t take place before the rainy season.

My unlawfully wedded wife and I made a lovely Sukkah and decorated it with corn stalks from our garden. Last night we sat there under the stars and prayed for acceptance and respect for all beings while migrating snails left slime trails on our socks.

Meanwhile, apparently to honor this holiday of extending a welcome to strangers, a coalition of 22 right-wing and religious fundamentalist groups declared October 12–18 “Marriage Protection Week: A Week Dedicated to Preserving the Sacred Institution of Marriage.” This coalition’s way of celebrating inclusiveness for all beings is to codify the prohibition on same-sex marriage. Their big push is amending the U.S. Constitution to say that marriage in the United States shall consist only of the union of a man and a woman.

It’s silly. Most of them are old enough to remember Bob Dylan telling us that the times they are a-changin’. Can’t they get onboard with the marriage equality Zeitgeist? It doesn’t seem to be hurting the Netherlands or Belgium or British Columbia or Ontario (that’s Ontario, Canada, lest you thought the southern California airport city was miraculously ahead of its time).

How is heterosexual wedlock threatened by welcoming gay and lesbian couples into the institution of marriage? Why should anyone care who chooses to spend the rest of their life arguing over which way to load the dishwasher? Why should only opposite-sex couples be entitled to unite in holy matrimony? That’s a right everyone should have—if they so choose and if they are blessed to find a partner who doesn’t mind the way they stack cereal bowls.

Sukkoth tradition teaches us to strive for godliness, to dedicate our every effort to increasing compassion and bringing peace. At a time when war and suffering plague the world, we shouldn’t squander our limited attention spans on this stupid “Marriage Protection” smoke screen.

It’s so much more productive to bundle up, experience the elements, ponder the cosmic one-ness of it all, and connect with friends and strangers. When everyone comes back inside, we log on to www.hrc.org/millionformarriage and sign the petition to support equal marriage rights. And then change our socks.

Sally Sheklow lives in Oregon with her partner of 16 years and would like their marriage legally recognized already.

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