| Out in the Arts
by D.L. Groover
GIVING A BATH TO THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN IN THE
WORLD 
You’re 131⁄2 feet high, perfectly
proportioned, godly muscled in the flush of young
manhood, and gloriously naked. You’re also
500 years old and haven’t seen the sun since
1873. If you’re Michelangelo’s marble
masterpiece of Renaissance sculpture, David, you’re
ripe for a restorative cleaning. Since his bath
is taking place in Italy, scandal and invective
buzz around his full mane of curls like mosquitoes
along the banks of the Arno.
Michelangelo fashioned his Renaissance man—intended
to grace the parapets of Florence’s cathedral—from
an unusually shallow block of marble that had
previously been discarded by two sculptors as
unworkable. When the immense naked man was unveiled
in 1504, the church authorities balked at the
up-close-and-personal nudity and hastily decided
not to exhibit it, even way up on the roofline.
After much bickering among Florence’s civic
leaders, who included Leonardo da Vinci, Michelangelo’s
great work was designated to adorn the city’s
town hall in the Piazza della Signoria. Florence
was flush in patriotic flag-waving, struggling
to retain its independence among rapacious neighboring
city-states. The 26-year-old Michelangelo’s
statue was the ultimate symbol of city valor,
strength, and coiled-spring anger. The nude giant
embodied all the virtues Florence wanted to flaunt
to the world.
Apparently, the Republic of Florence didn’t
want to show everything, for the prudish Florentines
pelted the sublime Il Gigante upon its unveiling
on September 8, 1504. Lightning struck the pedestal
in 1512, and David lost his left arm in 1527 during
a riot when the Medicis returned to Florence—it
was glued back on with stucco and metal pins.
By 1545, gilded fig leaves covered David’s
privates. For 31⁄2 centuries, he suffered
the indignities of weather, pollution, and pigeons—not
to mention a misguided hydrochloric acid wash
in 1843, which stripped whatever remained of Michelangelo’s
original protective wax coating as well as most
of the natural marble coloring. Finally, David
was brought out of the rain and given pride of
place in his own classical rotunda inside the
Galleria dell’Accademia. In 1991 a deranged
artist smashed one of his stone toes with a hammer,
while a century of interior grime and dust accumulated
on his shoulders and inside his ears. It was time
to wash his face and unclog his pores.
But then more chaos. Every art conservator in
the world had an opinion, but no one agreed. Cleaning
was good. Cleaning was bad. Cleaning would restore
David’s glory. Cleaning would destroy David’s
beauty. Dry brushes would be best. No, distilled
water should be used to remove caked-on grime
that a bristle can’t reach, commanded Opificio
delle Pietre Dura, Italy’s governmental
department for art restoration. Scheduled to begin
September 2001, the cleansing was put on hold
when the Accademia’s restorer, a specialist
in the works of Michelangelo, resigned in protest
over what she was asked to do to the statue. International
critics piped in but they, too, couldn’t
form a consensus on how best to handle the big
lug.
After repeated delays, expert art restorer Cinzia
Parnigoni was hired to lay gentle hands upon the
body. First, the area to be cleaned will be dusted,
then covered with a sheet of rice paper moistened
with distilled water, and topped with what the
restorers call a “mud pack” of cellulose
pulp and clay. The water seeps through this mask
and sucks up the dirt, which is then trapped in
the clay. After 15 minutes, the paper facial is
removed. Q-tips dipped in mineral spirits spot
clean stubborn wax stains.
It seems simple enough, but the method is controversial.
Critics decry the blanching that can occur, and
many want the world’s most famous sculpture
to be left alone. Meanwhile, the great artwork
gets dirtier day by day.
“This is not a restoration. It’s just
maintenance,” trumpeted Tuscany’s
art superintendent Antonio Paolucci the day cleaning
began. “David will be 500 years old in 2004.
He needs to be more presentable for his birthday.”
He’s certainly got the suit for it. We hope
David will survive the contemporary cleansing
so he can again live up to Vasari’s 1550
description:
For in it may be seen most beautiful contours
of legs, with attachments of limbs and slender
outlines of flanks that are divine. Nor has there
ever been seen a pose so easy, or any grace to
equal that in this work, or feet, hands and head
so well in accord, one member with another, in
harmony, design, and excellence of artistry. And,
of a truth, whoever has seen this work need not
trouble to see any other work executed in sculpture,
either in our own or in other times, by no matter
what craftsman.
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The Dead
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his marriage, his very soul.
Rhinoceros
November 20–December 13
Infernal Bridegroom Productions
In this 1959 black comedy from master playwright
Eugene Ionesco, everyman Berenger wakes to find
a rhinoceros rampaging through town. To his horror,
everyone around him turns into one, too. Ionesco’s
rant against conformity has been banned as dangerously
anti-Fascist, anti-Communist, anti-Peronist, or
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D.L. Groover writes monthly on the arts for OutSmart.
If you have any comments about this article,
please email them to letters@outsmartmagazine.com.
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