FEBRUARY CALENDAR

5, 12, 19, 26 (Mon.)

Heche Goes Hetero. In the Jan. 8 episode of Ally McBeal, Anne Heche (you haven’t already forgotten Ellen’s ex, have you?) was introduced as Melanie West, a high-maintenance new client of John Cage (Peter MacNicol). She was accused of intentionally running over her ex-boyfriend with her van and killing him. In the process, it seems that Melanie and John definitely have personal feelings for each other (love is in the air, but it’s not necessarily gay). Tune in to the February episodes to see the results. • Just because Heche is no longer with Ellen, is that any reason to dismiss her acting talent? Besides, it’ll give you a chance to see the hilarious and homophobic Richard Fish (Greg Germann) make a complete ass of himself...as usual. 8 pm on FOX.

7, 14, 21, 28 (Wed.)

HIV Testing. The Montrose Clinic offers free confidential HIV testing and counseling every Wednesday, 6-9 pm @ the Houston Lesbian & Gay Community Center, 803 Hawthorne. Center: 713/524-3818. Clinic: 713/830-3000. Please note: Free & confidential HIV/AIDS testing is also available from 1—3 pm on the 14th & 28th in Conroe at Northwoods AIDS Coalition, 1414 South Frazier, Ste. 106. More info: 936/441-1614.

9 & 10 (Fri. & Sat.)

All Clytemnestra on the Western Front. Michelle Spencer’s reorganized version of Homer’s epic poem is a tour de force one-woman show. In A Techno-Feminist Reconstruction of the Illiad, the narrative unfolds as the homebound Clytemnestra has video phone conversations with Agamemnon, Helen, Penelope, & Aegisthus–all of whom are played by Spencer. DiverseWorks, 1117 East Freeway. Info: 713/335-3445.

9—11 (Fri.—Sun.)

Texas Home & Garden Show features: designer home built in four days; room vignettes & elegant landscaping displays; pool & spa showcase; "how-to" seminars & demonstrations; gourmet cooking shows with tempting demos & delicious samples; and vacation, leisure, & outdoor show. Tickets available at the door. General admission $8 (children under 14 are free). Friday 2—9 pm; Saturday 10 am—9 pm; Sunday 11 am—6 pm. George R. Brown Convention Center, 1001 Avenida de las Americas, lower halls A, B, C. More info: 713/529-1616 or visit www.TexasHomeandGarden.com.

10 (Sat.)

Susan Goes Mad. Susan Sarandon a fairy? Well, not the queer kind. In an uncoming episode of MADtv, the gay-friendly actress plays the tooth fairy. This is her second appearance on the quirky show, probably because it’s her children’s favorite show. 10 pm on FOX.

10 (Sat.)

Rodeo Parade Brunch. In the tradition of spurs, chaps, & trail-blazing fun, the Alley Theatre Guild is hosting this 4th annual brunch, where guests will enjoy a catered buffet & unobstructed view of the Houston Rodeo Parade from the Alley Theatre’s 4th-floor balcony. All proceeds will benefit the Alley Theatre. 8:30 am—noon @ the Alley Theatre, 615 Texas Ave. Tickets are $35 ($20 for children under 12). For reservations/more info: Carole Wells at 713/222-1281.

10—12 (Sat.—Mon.)

From Russia With Love. Conductor Yakov Kreizberg returns to Houston with a program of Russian & Latvian masters. Rachmaninoff’s beloved Rhapsody and Shostakovich’s breathtaking Symphony No. 11, The Year 1905, are both performed. Tickets $17—$71. Sat. & Mon. at 8 pm, Sun. at 2:30 pm @ Jones Hall, 615 Louisiana. For more info: 713/224-7575 or visit www.houstonsymphony.org.

14 (Wed.)

Hooray for Love! Celebrate Valentine's Day with a classic romantic comedy. Then watch the surprise flick (to be announced on the evening) while you enjoy chocolate candy treats. Even better, everyone who watches the movie will receive a special Valentine. Love donations welcomed. 7 pm @ the Houston Lesbian & Gay Community Center, 803 Hawthorne, 713/524-3818.

16 (Fri.)

This Night of Desire is an evening of lust & longing; an evening of arousal, Eros, & fancy; of phallus-nostalgic, womb-envying hunger; of Cupid-craving, Bacchus-urgent, Aphordite-attendant appetite; of Himeros-ian, Dionysian itch & desire. Acclaimed visiting & local writers will read about desire and speak to the eternal subject through their poetry, prose, & high theory. 8 pm @ DiverseWorks, 1117 East Freeway. This six-act literary concert is a standing-room-only, one-night event, so reserve your seat early. Tickets $12 general; $5 students/seniors; $8 members. 24-hour reservation line: 713/335-3445.

16 (Fri.)

Literary Valentines. To celebrate the Valentine's Day weekend, five Houston poets will read verses on love and sex during "Passion, Poetry, and Politics 3: A Valentine's Event." This provocative evening will feature Michael Bolin, Aaron Coleman, Simone Cunningham, Donna Garrett, & Michael Locke. The event will also serve as a preview of Locke's new literary magazine, Consortium, which will debut in March and will include work by all of the evening's poets. $5 donation includes sweet refreshments. 7 pm @ the Houston Lesbian & Gay Community Center, 803 Hawthorne. More info: 713/524-3818.

16 (Fri.)

Battle of the Sexes. ComedySportz-Houston, an improvisational comedy troupe, holds their 11th annual Battle of the Sexes matches. The merits of gender dominance have been argued for years now, and in honor of St. Valentine, these two matches will give audiences the chance to see beauty meet brawn, as the sweet demure women square up against the big, burly men of Comedy-Sportz. We assume this is a pretty heterosexual show, but it’s no reason not to cheer your favorite chromosome combination anyway. Kickoffs are 7:30 & 10:30 pm @ Lambert Hall, 1703 Heights Blvd. (at 17th St.). Admission is $10, and reservations are recommended. Reservations/more info: 713/868-1444.

16 (Fri.)

America Now: The Legacy of American Pop is an exploration of the influence of rock, jazz, world music, & electronic music on late 20th-century concert music. 8 pm @ Wortham Center’s Cullen Theater, 500 Texas Ave. Tickets ($22—$33) are available by visiting www.culturefinder.com or by calling Da Camera Music Center at 713/524-5050.

16—18 (Fri.—Sun.)

Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater. Share in the magic, power, & passion of one of America’s best-loved & most-revered dance companies. With
a well-earned reputation as one of the most acclaimed international ambassadors of American culture, this new tour showcases premieres, new productions of vintage works, and their signature work, Revelations. Presented by Society for the Performing Arts at 8 pm @ Jones Hall, 615 Louisiana. Tickets ($15-$40) available by calling 713/227-4SPA (4772) or at Ticketmaster outlets.

17 (Sat.)

Out of the Silence. After years of songwriting ‘in the closet’ and playing piano for a handful of friends and family," Daniel Link says, "I was reminded by my partner Ralph that ‘music is a gift, and that gift is meant to be shared.’ With each step I took toward my dream, the universe took multiple steps toward me. Suddenly a career was forged with the help of an unseen hand. Now the phrase becomes literal, finally bringing my art Out of the Silence," which coincidentally is the title of his EP. • Out of the Silence ties into the subject matter of the opening and closing songs, as well as who Link is as an artist and a man. "Altar Boy," the opening song, exposes the realities of what organized religion can do to a young gay child. The song is direct, blunt, yet renders healing through the proclamation, "God’s love is free!" The closing song, "Constant Faithfulness," completes the song journey, written when his best friend told him he was HIV positive. "I remember where I was when I got the call, what time of day it was, what he said to me," Link recalls. "What I couldn’t do is find the words to express what I felt." Instead of talking, Link wrote a song for his friend to demonstrate the power of their friendship. "One thing I’ve learned in the gay community," he says, "is that our friendships are lasting and unbreakable. If anything, AIDS has taught me how beautiful we really are. Never before has the gay and lesbian community been given the opportunity to show the world, and ourselves, the kind of people we really are ... people with an extraordinary capacity for human compassion, selflessness, and growth." It is Link’s hope that Out of the Silence will serve as wakeup call, "not only to society," he says, "but to ourselves ... within our community and within our hearts, ever reminding us that we are essentially a people of love." The three other song titles on the EP are "I Still Need You Tonight," "Believe," and "Nature of Love." • So you’ve read what he says, now hear him sing tonight at The Sidecar Pub on 290 and Highway 6. He will share the bill with lesbian singer Christy Claxton (see OutSmart Calendar, November 2000). His EP is available at Borders, 9633-A Westheimer, and online on his site at www.mp3.com/daniellink.

17 (Sat.)

Asians and Friends Houston. It's a potluck party and game night at 7:30 pm at a member's suburban getaway. Asians & Friends Houston, Inc. (A&FH) is a nonprofit social group for gay and lesbian Asians and anyone interested in furthering their understanding of the gay and lesbian cultures of Asia. For more information, visit www.AsiansAndFriendsHouston.com or call 713/626-6300.

17 (Sat.)

Mardi Gras Galveston. Four parades today: 1) The Mystic of Krewe of Aquarius 15th annual parade celebrating space exploration starts at noon @ 14th & Seawall. Info: 409/621-1885; 2) The Z Krewe’s Z Procession starts at 1 pm @ 26th & Mechanic. Info: 281/331-2739 or pac@zkrewe.com; 3) Pinstripe Pasquinade starts at 2 pm @ 26th & Mechanic. Info: 713/377-6248. 4) Krewe of Gambrinus Parade starts at 6:30 pm @ 12th & Seawall. Info: 409/744-5900 or 409/737-1986. For more parades, see Feb. 24 & 25.

18 (Sun.)

Bisexuality Panel Discussion. Everyone invited to join in this discussion. Refreshments served. 1:30—3:30 pm @ First Unitarian Universalist Church, 5200 Fannin. More info: 713/526-5200.

18 & 25 (Sun.)

Introducing On Q: a torch song sung by the Statue of Liberty, "My Heart Belongs to Krishna," and other twisted stuff, silly songs & a few nice ones, performed by Charles Baker, David Carter, David Gebo, Rex Gillit, Daniel Lim, Neal Massey, and Mike McNamara. 7 pm @ The Little Room Downstairs Theater, 2326 Bissonnet. $15. Reservations/more info: 713/522-5737.

20 (Tue.)

Transgender Lobby Day. The Texas Gender Advocacy Information Network (TGAIN) will hold their fourth Transgender Lobby Day at the state capitol in Austin. For more information, contact TGAIN at sarahdepalma@ev1.net.

21 (Wed.)

The Grammys. The gay-friendly and/or not-so-gay-friendly 43rd Grammy Awards ceremony for the music industry should prove to be quite controversial this year. Since Eminem is nominated for a slew of awards, and since GLAAD is scheduled to protest his inclusion, you might want to tune in for the festivities (or the not-so-festive festivities, depending on your take) @ 7 pm on CBS, Channel 11. (Click here for more Grammys info.)

24 (Sat.)

Awaji Puppet Theater. Get a glimpse of the ancient tradition of Awaji puppetry–an art first developed to pay homage to the gods, ensuring the safety of houses, farmland, & fishing boats. Enjoy the Bunraku style as these fascinating puppets come to life with a range of delicate emotions & rapid magical transformations. Listen as the narrator spins the tale, accompanied by live music with traditional Japanes music. 8 pm @ Wortham Center’s Cullen Theater, 500 Texas Ave. Tickets range from $22—$32. More info: 713/227-1111 or visit www.spahouston.org.

24 (Sat.)

Chamber Orchestra Special. The Houston Symphony presents a special chamber orchestra concert with British conductor Nicholas McGegan at the helm. The evening spans the baroque style of Pergolesi. Tickets $20 & $30. 8 pm @ Stude Concert Hall, Shepherd School of Music, Rice University. More information: 713/224-7575 or visit www.houstonsymphony.org.

24 & 25 (Sat. & Sun.)

British Advertising Broadcast Awards celebrates the best in commercials from the UK. 7:30 pm on Sat. and 7 pm on Sun. in the Museum of Fine Arts’ Brown Auditorium, 1001 Bissonnet. $5 admission ($4 students/seniors). More info: 713/639-7531.

24 & 25 (Sat. & Sun.)

Mardi Gras Galveston. Three parades over this weekend: 1) Krewe of Espirit Rosaire Parade starts at 11 am on Saturday @ 27th & Seawall. Info: 409/762-2478; 2) Momus Grand Night Parade starts at 5:45 pm on Saturday @ 21st & Seawall. Info: 888-GAL-ISLE (425-4753); 3) Krewe of Munchkins Parade starts at 2 pm on Sunday @ 1500 of 25th. Info: 409/762-4401 or 409/765-7005. See Feb. 27 for the last procession.

25 (Sun.)

The Montrose Softball League (MSL) invites you to their annual Recruitment Day. Play softball, receive information, meet members, and join the league. The MSL has teams for all levels of play: beginner, recreational, & competitive. 10 am—2 pm @ Tim Hearn Softball Field located at Jackson Hill & Memorial Dr. (north side), just west of Waugh Dr. More info: call 713/867-3913; write MSL, P.O. Box 541954, Houston 77254-1954; or visit www.montrosesoftballleague.com.

27 (Tue.)

Mardi Gras Galveston. The Mystic Krewe of Aquarius annual Fat Tuesday procession, "We End What We Begin," starts at 6:30 pm @ 26th & Mechanic. Info: 409/744-5782 or 409/621-1885.

27 (Tue.)

Twentieth-Century Landscapes features music inspired by memory & nature. Called "a genius in a wasteland" by Aaron Copland, Charles Ives decided to work in the business world while composing the music that he truly wanted to write. His Violin Sonata No. 4, "Children’s Day at the Camp Meeting" features fragments of church hymns. Joan Tower’s Amazon and Toru Take-mitsu’s Rain Tree Sketch recall nature sounds. 7:30 pm @ the Menil Collection, 1515 Sul Ross. Tickets ($25) are available by visiting www.culturefinder.com or by calling Da Camera Music Center at 713/524-5050.

PLANNING AHEAD FOR MARCH

March

HOG Garage Sale. The Houston Outdoor Group is looking forward to another successful garage sale to raise funds for activities such as the Pride Parade in June 2001. At press time, a specific date in March had not been set for the sale. To donate items or for more info: 713/KAMP-OUT.

Mar. 1—4 (Thu.—Sun.)

Antiques. The Houston Antique Dealers Association’s (HADA) annual spring show & sale hosts over 150 antique dealers & specialists from across the country & around the world. Dealers will showcase antique furniture, silver, glass, porcelain, primitives, Orientalia, jewelry, linens, lace, quilts, artifacts, rugs, prints, paintings, lighting, china, dolls, and much more. Tickets (good for all four days): $9 at the door. Thur. 11 am—8 pm, Fri. & Sat. 11 am—7 pm, and Sun. noon—5 pm @ the George R. Brown Convention Center. Info: 713/764-4232.

Mar. 1—4 (Thu.—Sun.)

Let Us Entertain You (LUEY) Weekend is for those eager to continue celebrating after Mardi Gras. Ten clubs participate, attended by as many as 798 registered guests from 23 states and four foreign countries. The original tradition of LUEY Weekend was to entertain out-of-town guests, and it continues with no fee for guests registering from out of town. Local guests pay only $15. Advance registration is required. Pre-registration takes place on Thursday, March 1, from 8—10 pm @ the Outpost. Info: www.lueyweekend.com.

Mar. 2 (Fri.)

The Ritz. In honor of Rita Moreno’s Houston concerts this weekend, our community center has scheduled to show The Ritz, the hilarious 1976 film about a dolt who hides from his murderous brother-in-law in a gay bathhouse. Critic Leonard Maltin says, "Moreno is memorable re-creating her Tony-winning role as no-talent entertainer Googie Gomez." 7 pm @ the Houston Lesbian & Gay Community Center, 803 Hawthorne. More info: 713/524-3818. (For an interview with Rita Moreno, click here.)

Mar. 3 (Sat.)

The Human Rights Campaign annual black tie gala will take place at the Westin Galleria on Alabama. The incredibly funny Georgia Ragsdale is returning from last year as the emcee. Billy Bean, a former major league baseball player, who was recently featured on ABC’s 20/20 and in The Advocate will be the keynote speaker. Individual tickets can be purchased by calling 800-494-TIXS. More info, contact this year’s co-chairs: Bret Baccus at 713/807-7408 or Dalia Stokes at 713/522-2224.

Mar. 3 (Sat.)

Red, the theme for this year’s DiverseWorks gala, promises to be a truly spectacular evening. The festivities begin at 7 pm with a cocktail reception and preview of artist-designed table centerpieces. A silent auction continues throughout the evening, including fun & unique items such as a weeklong trip to Biarritz, France; a trip to Mexico City with a private guided tour of the pyramids; a progressive dinner in artist studios; Louis Vuitton luggage; and much more. Regional artists are creating fantastic one-of-a-kind red centerpieces for each of the dining tables, which will also be up for auction. The mouth-watering menu will include contributions from Houston’s top restaurants. Dancing to the sounds of a live band follows the buffet dinner. Individual tickets are available at the following levels: friend, $150; sponsor, $250; benefactor, $500; and underwriter, $1,000. Tables of 10 are also available. All proceeds benefit DiverseWorks. For reservation information: Lisa Haynes at 713/223-8346.

Mar. 4 (Sun.)

AIDS Walk Houston is an AIDS awareness fundraising walk event to benefit individuals/families infected or affected with HIV/AIDS. In 2000, thousands of people took a big step for AIDS awareness by raising over $325,000 to support the critical work of numerous local AIDS service organizations. Combined, these agencies provide education, healthcare, food, shelter, employment training, & a variety of vital services to over 100,00 Houstonians. The event is set to begin and end at Sam Houston Park. To register, call 713/623-6796 or visit www.aidshelp.com.

Mar. 9 (Fri.)

The Spirit of Africa: Randy Weston and African Rhythms. Pianist Randy Weston is a veteran explorer who has discovered the roots of jazz in the soil of Africa. The Master Gnawa Musicians of Morocco, Weston’s creative muses of the last 30 years, join Weston in this performance with his band & saxophonist & Houston native Billy Harper. 8 pm @ Wortham Center’s Cullen Theater, 500 Texas Ave. Tickets ($27—$37) are available by calling Da Camera Music Center at 713/524-5050 or by visiting www.culturefinder.com.

Mar. 10 (Sat.)

Pilobolus. Acclaimed for a startling mix of humor & invention, Pilobolus adds Klezmer music to the mix in a new co-commission by Society for the Performing Arts. The wondrous, sculptural forces of Pilobolus meet the ecstatic sounds of the Klezmatics, performing live, in this premiere, plus three more works from the repertory. 8 pm @ Jones Hall, 615 Louisiana. Tickets ($15-$38) available by calling 713/227-4SPA (4772) or at Ticketmaster outlets.

Mar. 23—25 (Fri.—Sun.)

Texas Lesbian Conference. The 14th conference takes place at San Antonio’s AmeriSuites Riverwalk and features Luz Guerra, social activist & trainer; Kelli Herd, director of It’s in the Water; and Laura Jimenez, a comedian from the California bay area. Workshop topics include coming out, dating, maintaining relationships, women’s health issues, political activism for busy people, computer communications, & other ways to meet people. For more information: e-mail to TLCSanAntonio@aol.com or visit the website at www.hometown.aol.com/tlcsanantonio/myhomepage/index.html.

PERFORMING ARTS

• The Blue Room. Arthur Schnitzler described Reigen, his loose series of sexual sketches as "completely unprintable," and indeed its premiere in 1921 spurred an obscenity suit. It was only when Max Ophuls made his famous film in 1950 that the work became known as La Ronde. Now David Hare has reset these circular scenes of love & betrayal in the present day with a cast of two actors playing a succession of characters whose sexual lives enmesh like a daisy chain. The Blue Room is a brilliant meditation on men & women, sex & social class with deft insight about the gap between the sexes. Tickets are $18 & $20. Through Feb. 24 @ Theater LaB Houston, 1706 Alamo, 713/868-7516. Recommended for adult audiences.

• Camp Logan. A theatrical drama based on the 1917 courts-martial and execution of 19 black soldiers, Camp Logan delves into the world of the early military and discovers men who are sleeping with the enemy. It probes into the lives of the black soldiers who rose up in arms against the discrimination they encountered in 1917 while stationed at Houston’s Camp Logan. This gripping drama reveals how war gives rise to unlikely heroes. Through Feb. 27 @ The Ensemble Theatre, 3535 Main Street, 713/520-0055.

• The Countess explores the straight love triangle involving the celebrated art critic John Ruskin, his wife Effie, & the pre-Raphaelite painter John Everett Millais. $20 & $25. Through Feb. 25 @ Main Street Theater, 2540 Times Blvd., 713/524-6706.

• Dirty Little Showtunes! follows the format of "Forbidden Broadway," a satirical revue in its 18th year in New York. "Forbidden Broadway" uses new lyrics to Broadway show tunes to spoof the industry. Dirty Little Showtunes! does the same, only with a gay subtext. • Tom Orr, lyricist, has taken two dozen Broadway show tunes and rewritten them from the gay male perspective. The result is highly irreverent, outrageous, occasionally gross, but very delightful. • According to Orr: "In 1993, when I first started as theater critic for The Seattle Times at the age of 23, I thought I’d found the perfect job for a young actor and writer whose love for the theater had sidetracked him from the early leanings toward a journalism career. But my boss informed me of the conflict of interest that barred me from performing, writing, or producing my own work, and I became the saddest and ugliest of nature’s aberrations: a frustrated critic." • But Orr finally got off his ass and followed his dream. Dirty Little Showtunes! has had very successful productions in Seattle, Chicago, and San Francisco, and now it’s here in Houston directed by Joe Watts. Fridays & Saturdays at 8 p.m., through Feb. 24 @ Theatre New West, 1415 California Street (one block north of Westheimer between Commonwealth & Waugh, on the ground floor of the Sonoma Restaurant building). Tickets are $20. Reservations: 713/394-0464.

• Equus. Winner of the 1975 Tony Award for Best Play and named by the Drama League as one of the top 10 plays of the 20th century, Equus is a powerful examination of hypocrisy, sexuality, & the nature of worship by the celebrated author of Amadeus, Peter Shaffer. When a psychiatrist investigates what would drive a 17-year-old boy to savagely blind six horses with a metal spike in a stable in rural England, he finds himself face to face with his own personal demons. Through Feb. 10 @ the Alley Theatre, 615 Texas Ave. Tickets range from $32—$49 and can be purchased at the Alley box office or by calling 713/228-8421.

• Eyes for Consuela. The Houston premiere of Sam Shepard’s Eyes for Consuela examines the lives of two men: Henry, a member of the American middle class who is separated from his wife, and Amado, a Mexican man so devoted to his lady that he literally collects bouquets of blue eyes for her. The two discuss the sacrifices they have made and will make for the women they love. Henry, it seems, might sacrifice his life for Amado’s love if his eyes are blue. Tickets $14 (students/seniors $10). Fridays & Saturdays at 8 pm, Sundays at 2 pm, through Feb. 24 @ Actors Theatre of Houston, 2506 South Boulevard, 713/529-6606.

• A Flea in Her Ear. One of the Alley’s most popular plays in the last decade, A Flea in Her Ear is a chaotic comedy in which Raymonde Chandebise assumes her husband Victor-Emmanuel must be having an affair, as he has recently been unable to fulfill his conjugal duties. When she asks a friend to request a rendezvous with her husband, and he in turn asks a friend to replace him at the rendezvous, a chain reaction of frenzied mistaken identities & misplaced jealousies begin. Feb. 23—Mar. 24 @ the Alley Theatre, 615 Texas Ave. Tickets to preview performances are $19—$35; tickets to performances on or after the Feb. 28 opening are $32—$49 and can be purchased at the box office or by calling 713/228-8421.

• Houston Grand Opera (HGO) revives its delightful production of Mozart’s Cosi fan tutte. Two couples are manipulated and tricked by the crafty old Don Alfonso and a maid into believing that their lovers cannot be faithful. • HGO also presents its first performance of Borodin’s Russian epic, Prince Igor. Set in 12th-century Russia, Igor Sviatoslavich leaves his wife in the care of her brother and sets out with his army against a Tartar tribe from Central Asia. Prince Igor & his son are captured in battle, but the prince is assured that he is a guest and not a captive. • Cosi fan tutte runs through Feb. 10; Prince Igor runs through Feb. 11. • Each opera: $22—$200; tickets available by phone at 713/227-ARTS, in person at the Wortham Ticket Center (in the Wortham lobby), or online at www.houstongrandopera.org. Both operas: Wortham Center’s Brown Theater, Texas at Smith.

• Lou Tells a Big One. is another original comedy featuring the "Single Fertle Family" from Dumpster, Texas. Uncle Al is opening a new Honky Tonk, Bridgette Fertle is about to reaveal the actual father of her baby, someone in town has won $85 million in the lottery, & Lou has lied his way into a mess that just might cost him everything. Through May 5 @ Radio Music Theatre, 2623 Colquitt. Admission is $15, and reservations are required. 713/522-7722.

• Old Wicked Songs. Stephen Hoffman, a young pianist troubled by artistic block, travels to Vienna and enlists he help of an elderly singing instructor to help him return to the stage. The student-teacher relationship evolves, though not without conflict, as Stephen and his instructor, Josef Mashkan, clash not only over musical style & technique but religion & history. Ultimately, Stephen’s journey of self-discovery & rejuvenated passion for music help the instructor come to terms with his own past. Tickets $19—$42. Through Feb. 11 @ Stages Repertory Theatre, 3201 Allen Parkway. More info: 713/52-STAGE.

• Synergy. When Deb’s routine dentist appointment turns out to be a meeting with the Devil, she bargains her way back to the living with a promise to secure a certain number of souls. Naturally, she begins her scavenger hunt in the corporate sector–the Disney Corporation, to be exact. Synergy is a look at human nature & the ultimate gifts we, the living, take for granted. Through Mar. 4 @ the Alley Theatre, 615 Texas Ave. Tickets ($37—$42) can be purchased at the Alley box office or by calling 713/228-8421.

• Tales of the Lost Formicans is a bizarre comedy/drama that deals with everything from dysfunctional families to alien abduction. From Time magazine: "If not the best new play of recent years, surely this is the most imaginative. Constance Congdon’s brilliant off-Broadway script wryly deflects the story of a man with Alzheimer’s disease into a travel guide to Middle America conducted by aliens." Tickets $15. Fridays & Saturdays at 8 pm, through Feb. 17 @ Ashland St. Theatre, 2610 Ashland in the Heights, 713/426-3019.

• Visiting Mr. Green. The elderly retired Mr. Green wanders into traffic and is almost hit by a 29-year-old coporate executive. The young man is charged with reckless driving and given a community-service sentence of helping Mr. Green once a week for six months. What starts out as a comedy about two men who do not want to be in the same room together turns into a gripping and moving drama as they get to know each other, come to care about each other, and open old wounds they’ve been nursing for years. Parental discretion. $20 Friday & Saturday, $15 Sunday & Monday. Through Feb. 12 @ The Little Room Downstairs Theater, 2328 Bissonnet, 713/522-LRDS (5737).

PERFORMING ARTS FOR YOUNG PEOPLE

• The Courage of Mandy Kate Brown. Follow the journey of a young slave girl traveling the famous Underground Railroad as her courage creates a bridge between two warring countries. For 1st—8th grades. Tickets $8. Through Mar. 3 @ Stages Repertory Theatre, Allen Parkway at Waugh Drive, 713/52-STAGE.

• Symphony Safari. Musical animals provide adventure from Flight of the Bumble Bee to music from The Jungle Book and a new work by acclaimed children’s composer Gregory Smith entitled The Zoo Song. For children ages 4 to 13 and their families. Sat., March 3 (10 am with pre-concert activities beginning at 9 am; and 11:30 am with post-concert activities beginning following the concert) @ Jones Hall, 615 Louisiana. Tickets: $13 adults, $8 children in reserved seating (main floor, box seats, & grand tier), and $8 adults, $4 children in general admission seating (mezzanine & balcony). Tickets are available at Jones Hall or at all Ticketmaster outlets; by calling 713/224-7575; or online at www.houstonsymphony.org.

RADIO

• After Hours Saturdays, midnight to 3 am. Featuring the QMZ (Queer Music Zone) with Jimmy Carper. KPFT 90.1 FM.

• Lesbian & Gay Voices Mondays, 8-10 pm. Features, news, music, interviews, reviews, and commentary. KPFT 90.1 FM, 713/526-4000.

ART/PHOTOGRAPHY

) Art Classes for People With HIV: The Art League of Houston is offering free art classes for people with HIV. The ongoing course meets every Thursday & Friday from 1-4 pm at the Art League, 1953 Montrose. Mixed media projects for the artist and non-artist. Constructive art-making in a relaxed atmosphere. Focus is on the healing power of art. More info: 713/523-9530. The Museum of Fine Arts Houston is offering free art classes for those with HIV/AIDS. Patrick Palmer begins his 9th year offering art instruction. Abstract painting, linoleum-cut greeting cards, & ceramics are some of the media offerings for the fall semester. Class is limited to 16. Everything is free, even lunch! The classes meet at the Glassell School of Art every Friday, 1—4 pm, 5101 Montrose Blvd., room 202. For more info: 713/639-7500 or 713/526-1118.

) Art-o-mat. DiverseWorks joins a network of sites throughout the U.S. serving as hosts for a national project known as Art-o-mat. Artists T. Clark Whittington and George Doles III, residents of the tobacco town of Winston-Salem, founded the Art-o-mat project in 1997. Their mission was to create an outlet where artists can expose their names & works to people who would otherwise not see it. They worked under the premise that art should be progressive, yet personal & approachable. What better way to do this than with a heavy cold steel machine? Whittington has refurbished an old cigarette vending machine specifically for DiverseWorks. The group Artists In Cellophane, as well as Houston-based artists, have filled the machine with original works of art that can be yours to keep for a mere $3—$5. The machine will be refilled with new art monthly. DiverseWorks will keep it filled to meet your demand. Through June 2001 @ DiverseWorks, 1117 East Freeway, 713/223-8346.

) Breathe. Sarah Nix Ginn’s rhythmic pin-pushing hastens its beat in this installation. Known for her intense and fragile pursuits structured in commercial dress patterns and straight pins, this ephemeral departure represents a "coming-up for air" for this Houston artist. Feb. 9—Mar. 3 @ Diverse-Works, 1117 East Freeway, 713/223-8346. Opening reception is Friday, Feb. 9, 6—8 pm.

) Donald Lipski: A Brief History of Twine. This mid-career survey of Lipski includes more than 30 works of art, ranging from the early Building Steam #351 (1985) to the most recent Exquisite Copse No. 17 (2000), and features several large-scale installations, such as The Starry Night (1994)–a room-sized project comprised of thousands of razor blades sliced into the wall. Through Mar. 18 @ Blaffer Gallery, the Art Musem of UofH, entrance #16 off Cullen Blvd., 713/743-9530.

) Humanoid is a whimsical, colorful, strange presentation of works by 12 artists whose art is inspired by, although not necessarily representative of, the human form. Flesh, orifices, body parts, & other-worldly characters inhabit the works. Somehow, skewed realism, bulbous abstraction, melodrama, vibrating colors & patterns, and melancholy find common ground through shared carnality & wry wit. Through Feb. 24 @ Diverse-Works, 1117 East Freeway, 713/223-8346.

) Pleasurscape is a new installation by award-winning designer Karim Rashid, who is internationally recognized as one of the most innovative designers working today. His vision for the future is one where furniture & space merge. Through Feb. 25 @ Rice University Art Gallery, campus entrance 1 at the intersection of Main Street & Sunset Blvd. For more info: 713/348-6069.

) Postive Art. The photographs in this exhibition were taken by participants in the Positive Art Workshops of the Glassell School of Art. The workshops target adults who are HIV positive. Participants were encouraged to make images and keep journal entries that revolved around issues of self or that described a sense of place. The resulting work is a fascinating insight into the lives, feelings, thoughts, & poetry of people who have been afflicted by HIV. The exhibition traveled from its December home at the Glassell School of Art to its new home at the Houston Lesbian & Gay Community Center and is scheduled to hang around till the spring at the center, 803 Hawthorne, 713/524-3818.