Susan Bankston

Susan Bankston lives in Richmond, Texas, where she writes about her hairdresser at The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc., at juanitajean.com.
Columns

Ben-Gay…And Other Things Your Dad Can Spread On Himself At Your Gay Wedding

What I’m fixin’ to tell you is dead-solid-perfect true, and so damn uncivilized that you’re gonna shake like a guy…

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Columns

Gun Crazy: Is That A Gun In Your Backpack, Or Are You Just Unhappy To See Me?

Our Texas Legislature, in its dastardly wisdom, has decided that one of the biggest problems in Texas is that we…

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Columns

Seriously?! The Bathroom?!

It’s all about the plumbing, y’all. Houston’s November election has become all about taking a leak.

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Columns

Fantasy Islands: Donald Trump and Texas’ Own Louie Gohmert

California has earthquakes, drought, and wildfires. Texas has Republican Congressvarmint Louie Gohmert. California does not want to trade.

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Columns

Sincerely Yours: The Insincere Texas Attorney General

Attorney General Ken Paxton is the reigning champion of the world-famous “How the Hell Did He Get Elected?” pinball game.

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Columns

Mayoral Rat Race

Will a Republican mayor save us from our heathen ways?

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Columns

Tea Party Paranoia

In case you haven’t heard, Texas is being taken over by President Obama and the federal government.

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Columns

Hoochie-Koochie

At least two Texas Republican State Representatives can’t stop thinking about sex

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Columns

You Never Know

Do we need drones and eight-foot fire-truck ladders? LeftOut

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Columns

Those Adorable Libertarians

Has wacky-weed made them a little doodle in the noodle?

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